I have had people ask me if they're twins. Seriously? SB is much bigger than Mac, but maybe they just figure since they're a boy and girl that they got difference size genes.
The first few months I would take the kids out by myself people did give me looks - SB had just turned 2 and Mac was 10 months when he came home. It was pretty obvious they were close in age. I had several people make comments to me, "Don't you know what causes that?" Strangers, I mean! "Yes," I would say, "Adoption causes it." That usually quieted people pretty fast.
But the notion doesn't escape me - IF I had given birth to Mac I would have gotten pregnant when SB was 5 months old. I can't imagine. I was so far into the throws of PPD (post pardum depression) I probably would have jumped off a bridge if I had had an infant and a growing stomach - again.
It sounds kind of mean and sarcastic of me to say I'm glad I didn't birth both my children, but it's the truth. For one, I think I would have keeled over if I had birthed two children that close together. I was exhausted as it was, and I had plenty of energy when Mac came home.
Secondly, I needed that extra year to prepare for a 2nd child. Yes, if you count back, we applied to adopt when SB was only 6 months old - but we must have know it would take a long time. And it did...about 18 months until we brought Mac home.
Third. Well. We wouldn't have had Mac if I had given birth to him. We would have had someone else entirely. It wouldn't have been Mac. Adoption brought him into our family and there was no other way to do that.
So I don't apologize for saying I'm glad I didn't birth both my children. Our family dynamic would have been completely different if I had. And I think I would have become even crazier than I already am.
|Family picture, Jan 2009 with a 1 year old and a 2 year old.|