Saturday, November 26, 2011

Blood is NOT Thicker than Water

We all know the phrase "Blood is thicker than water." And we all know round about what it means. According to wikipedia,
"Blood is thicker than water" is a German proverb (originally: Blut ist dicker als Wasser.), which is also common in English speaking countries. It generally means that the bonds of family and common ancestry are stronger than those bonds between unrelated people (such as friendship). by CatMacBride

It means that your family trumps others, right?
But does blood have to define a family?

Are you married? You are not (or should not be) related to your spouse by blood. And that person is family. How about your in-laws?
Do you have a step-parent or step-child whom you love dearly? No blood ties there, either.

And, of course, the adoptive child.
Yes. I share blood with my daughter. But not with my son. Or my husband for that matter. I'm only blood related to 1/3 of the people I live with!

So then, according to this ancient proverb, I should be more willing to die for SB than for Marshall or Mac.

Well, that's just not true. Not at all. I would die for any of them and blood has nothing to do with it.
No blood there.

And one day Mac will realize that we do not share blood with him. He will realize he does share blood with three other children, two birth parents and a host of extended family. Will that mean more to him than us - the family that raised him and loved him his whole life?
I hope not.
I hope, though, that he does see that there is a bond between those who share blood. I may not have biological siblings, but I have two cousins whom I love as if they were sisters. They are my kids' aunts, their children my kids' cousins. We share blood and we are close.

But, since I am an only child, I've had to "adopt" siblings (not legally, just figuratively). My BFF and the NotMine's are my family. I consider NotMine1 & NotMine2 my nieces, the BFF and her hubby are like my siblings. I love them dearly, I would sacrifice a great deal for them.

I share blood with my cousins, but not with the BFF. But all are my family. Just like both SB and Mac are my children - who shares my blood makes no difference.

I want both my children (and any others we may have in the future) to know that it's not blood that makes a family. It's love. It's commitment. It's an on-going decision to make an effort for those we want to be in our family.

Like a marriage - it must be fought for, it must be treasured, if it is to be preserved.

Blood is not thicker than water in this house. Love is. Love is thicker that them both.


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