I somehow clicked a "wrong" link and wound up not where I intended, but completely where God intended. I blogged about it back then and have returned to that verse several times over the last year plus.
Yesterday I spent time at the hospital with my precious daughter. Her doctor thought she might have an appendicitis. Two CT scans, 2 vials of blood (thank goodness Daddy was there), 5+ hours and more later - no appendicitis, thank God. She has an "impacted bowel," which is doctor speak for constipated. If she doesn't get moving soon though, it could cause further problems, so we're praying it will resolve quickly. (did you ever think before you were a parent that you would pray for poop? Nope, neither did I...)
Today also marks 2 weeks from when we will be in court fighting to keep our son with us and away from a family that we can only describe as toxic. I try my best not to judge his birth family - we don't know them - but there's a reason he was taken from them. And for the past 19 months we've learned a lot about the family that tells us that the state made the right decision by him.
So I've been stressed out. I'm exhausted. I feel like I've been running a marathon, and if you know me you know that I consider myself allergic to running (LOL). But I've been running my race.
And in my email inbox was a verse of scripture. Picked by someone I don't know intended for a large mass emailed audience, but God chose it for me.
It's my verse.
Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. ~Hebrews 12:1
I smiled when I saw it. Despite how tired I am and how much I am ready for my race to be finished...tears sprang to my eyes after the day I had yesterday and the battle we've been waging since last year.
Yes, I am a huge sinner. I am so far from perfect...but I do my best to live my life for God and I want everyone to see me cross that finish line praising God regardless of where I place in the race.Of course, with Mac's case I want my son to be the winner in this. It's not about me, it's about him. And about Him.
Keep running the race, it's almost finished...the checkered flag is in sight. I'm almost there, thank God, I'm almost there.