Friday, March 25, 2011


This week in my Bible Study class, the topic turned to "the good old days" when everyone raised everyone else's children. When I was growing up, my parents were at the least friendly and at the most good friends with our neighbors. It helped that there were 6 houses in a row with children within 5 years of my own age. But if a child was gone too long, the parent would call all the houses and someone would say, "Oh, yes, she's here!"

But that turned the conversation to how we just don't have those friendships anymore. I don't know my neighbors at all, let alone their names. Of course, none have young children, so we don't just bump into them as we're going along. But I have never purposefully gone to talk to them.

And I don't have the friendships I used to have. I have three great friends. None of which I see (two live hundreds of miles away). And I have several "friends." I put that in quotes because I would say they're my friends, but we have not had the chance to just hang out and get to know one another. Usually they work and I don't, or the kids make it impossible for deep conversation where we can learn about each other.
But I also find that we just don't seek out those relationships anymore. We're too busy. We have too much on our plates.
One lady said she couldn't remember the last time her family was invited to go to someone else's house for a meal. Another said she invites people over all the time and most politely decline, but those who come leave as soon as the meal is over. They say they don't want to impose.

Where's the camaraderie we used to have as an American society? Where we spent time - real time - with one another. We live in such a fast-paced, Facebook world that we just don't spent time with one another.
Why would I need to sit down over coffee with Kim or Shari or Amanda to hear what's going on with them when I can read it as it happens on Facebook, text or email?

I think we need to move back to a society where we care about each other enough to take the time to sit down and get to know one another face-to-face. Take the time to talk and get to the point where we can share experiences with one another.

What do you think?


sheridan said...

Totally agree with you!

We have planned to invite folks over as soon as all the sickness leaves our house. It is looking like that won't be this year! :D

Anyway, I refuse to "do" Facebook because, well, I'd like to have more meaningful relationships instead of seeing all the happy things (or the perpetually negative people) on Facebook.

You want to come over for dinner? You can stay as long as you like!

Beth said...

Well, i have nothing against technology, since it has aided me in some very deep friendships.

But i also think it's the fast-paced life . . . and largely the society in which most women work outside the home, that has led to this.

While i wasn't working, i began enjoying wonderful visits with other women...the kind of visit that lasts all day and requires two pots of coffee.

Those are lovely . . . and so meaningful.


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